NOTE: I am working on Tracks for our bible engagement app, Grow On. I’m writing this week about the challenges of family life. I love this content I just finished and thought it might be helpful on my blog.
So you will walk in the way of the good and keep to the paths of the righteous. For the upright will inhabit the land, and those with integrity will remain in it … Proverbs 2:20-21
Think back to the last argument you had with your parents? What was it over? Does it even really matter today? If you’re being honest, you’d probably agree that most disagreements you have with mom and dad begin over little things. But if you’re not careful, these little things can start to become big things. When you and your parents disagree, it’s important to be honest and on point at the beginning so small disagreements don’t turn into all-out war. When you don’t communicate exactly how you feel, you build up a lot of anger and often end up saying something hurtful that you’ll regret later.
But it can be risky to be open and honest, especially when you assume the thing you’re going to say may not be received too well by your parents. That’s why you need to remember these three tips when you’re trying to resolve an argument:
- Always speak with respect. Your parents may not agree with what you say. However, an honest word spoken with respect will get you a lot farther than an honest word spoken with disrespect.
- Never speak with anger. This may mean that when an argument starts, you need to take time to cool down before a discussion continues. Proverbs 15:1 says, “A kind answer soothes angry feelings, but harsh words stir them up.” If you really want to resolve a conflict rather than keep arguing, then don’t forget this: Speaking out of anger will never resolve a conflict. It’ll only make it worse.
- Choose your words wisely. Speaking honestly is important. However, this doesn’t mean that you have complete freedom to babble on and on just to get your point across. Choose your words wisely. Proverbs 10:19 says, “You will say the wrong thing if you talk too much—so be sensible and watch what you say.”
* What can be difficult about speaking your mind, especially to your parents?
* Is there a conversation you need to have with mom and dad? If so, get strategic in your approach. Consider cooking dinner for them and talking things out. Or, go grab coffee, get comfortable, and begin a heart-to-heart. And, don’t forget to pray before the conversation begins. Lifting it all up to God takes the pressure off of you and gives it over to the one who can handle it.